Arthur Bremer and Loneliness

In 1972, Democratic presidential candidate George Wallace was getting ready for another rally in Laurel Maryland. He was undoubtedly one that many people did not favor due to his segregation views, but overall, he felt he did not need to wear a bulletproof vest at this event and left it in the trunk of a trooper's car. After all, people who would think about shooting a presidential candidate would send death notes, right?

What ended up happening this day was George getting shot four times, resulting in being paralyzed from the waist down by a man named Arthur Bremer, a chronic loner and the very type of person who would never give a warning that he would do such a thing.

Arthur Bremer

Arthur was a very isolated person, always off on his own, and lacked the necessary social skills to make meaningful connections with others. When he did, such as getting a girlfriend, he drove her away by not being welcoming or social enough to obtain her parent's approval of their relationship. In addition, the only real friend Arthur had, Thomas Neuman, committed suicide.

Arthur was not someone who was able to "fit in" with the world. He had a hard time making sense of his thoughts, and would often be challenged with trying to put pieces together in a well-organized manner. He knew he needed connection, often scribbling down things that he could do to attract others to fulfill his loneliness needs, but the efforts were never executed and remained on paper. Arthur was chronically lonely, and it may have been the very thing that drove him to commit his felony.

Why Do We Experience Loneliness as A Species?

In summary, it is a biological mechanism. Neanderthals, for example, should have conquered our species. But because we are better at socializing, that could be the primary reason we won. We effectively socialized our way out of the prehistoric period and built societies, packs, and relationships that continued to grow. But that desire to make those communities and connections stems from the feeling of loneliness. That feeling guided us in seeking and reaching out to others and allowing us to basically take over the earth. So, if you are feeling lonely, know that this is not a flaw, but a vital part of how we evolved. 

Today, loneliness is so normal that we do not try to classify it. We talk about it, but not the same way as depression or anxiety. In fact, up until this decade, it was not a clinical diagnosis.

Myth #1: Every Man Is an Island

We see loner cops, cowboys, batman, and all sorts of figures that romanticize loneliness. But the truth is that chronic loneliness does not turn you into a badass, and losing sight of the independence and loneliness line is detrimental. When someone has chronic loneliness, they are subjected to numerous health issues, such as:

·         Cardiovascular disease

·         Nero generic disease

·         Cognitive decline

·         Immune system issues

·         Infections

Furthermore, a Meta Study by Julian Holt-Lunstad from BYU showed that the mortality of people who were lonely was 50% higher than those who were not, despite their age or sex.

So, no, being a loner does not make you a badass. It actually makes you a walking statistic, and you should remediate it before it pushes you over the edge like it did to Arthur.

Myth #2 Solitary Confinement Is an Effective Punishment for Violent Criminals 

Arthur Bremer was found guilty, not insane, and was placed in an ordinary prison with a 63-year sentence, which later went down to 53 years. With good behavior after a rocky road in the beginning, he was able to shed 16 more years off. He has been free since 2007, where he still lives in isolation to this day. Overall, treating lonely prisoners with more isolation is only going to make things worse.

Based on another inmate named Robert King, spending 32 years in jail, with 29 of them being in solitary confinement. After his release, he told reporters how he now had trouble recognizing faces, matching personalities, and taking directions. His brain ended up erasing his normal abilities and deemed them not valuable anymore since he was not using them. This concept was also tested on rats, where those rats would obtain new branching neurons within the first month of isolation as a defense mechanism (useful for meditation). But after that timeframe, the areas of the brain unused would start to prune up and shut down.

Now, if American prisons were more like Swedish prisons, there would be a much more significant positive impact. Swedish repeat crime is 40%, whereas America's is 83%, with 44% of that being within the first year of release. Biggest difference? No isolation and the prisoners are treated like humans.

Myth #3 - Social Media Connects Us More and Can Solve Loneliness

“Asking if social media makes you lonely and depressed is a little like asking if eating makes you fat.” - Jeremy Nobel, MD, MPH

The modern-day digital age is connecting the world, yet segregating us more than ever before. Social media may allow you to have tons of followers, but how many of them do you really have deep connections with?  It is better to have a small group to support you rather than hundreds of surface leveled relationships. Social media is not a bad thing to avoid, but always remember that it should be a supplement to your loneliness needs, but the main course.

How to Cure Loneliness

First and foremost, you need a support system. Sure, one close friend will work well, but always make sure that you have someone else to fall back on too in case something happens to them, like Arthur’s friend.

Second, there is a developing pull called Allopregnanolone, which will not cure loneliness, but substantially reduce the adverse effect from it by improving stress and reducing hypervigilance in the brain. That is something you can look forward to, hopefully in the near future.

Another and final way we will discuss is self-reflection. There is a Guardian article called Seven Ways To Overcome Loneliness, that can help you get on the right track to fulfill your needs as a human. Some things they discuss are increasing meaningful social contact, changing your way of thinking, and understanding the type of connection you need (friendship, your parents, romantic relationships, etc.) so you can go out and get it successfully.

Final Thoughts

Chronic loneliness does not get the attention that it deserves, at least not until the last decade. If you are in this boat, forgive yourself for this basic vulnerability and view it as your body communicating with you to seek out connection. Take some time to identify your specific need and reach out to fulfill that void in a healthy, meaningful way. 

Written by Todd Lemense presented by Joe Anthony