Episode 97 - Fixing Partners & Training Spouses

Is it ethical to train your husband like a puppy? To use treats and stimuli? Or to enter a new relationship with plans to fix the other person?

Today’s episode isn’t just about fixing a “Bad Boy” or trying to get the wife to sit through a football game. Todd and Joe are going deep with the ethical and moral implications of trying to train one’s spouse. Because, oh boy, the idea of fixing other people has taken on a new life in the media - especially during Covid. Probably because we’re all locked indoors with our significant others, slowly going mad while we listen to the sound of them chew - or whatever strange idiosyncrasies they’ve clung to.

So is it moral to fix someone? What if society will literally benefit from them being “fixed” by you? Like the woman on Twitter who wants to “fix” the Joker? Is there even such a thing as fixing a spouse, or are we all just fooling ourselves - thinking we’re witnessing a meaningful change when all we’re doing is getting used to our partner’s behavior? We’ll also reference interviews of couples in their 70’s, 80’s, and 90’s. Couples who know what it’s like to fruitlessly try to change their spouse’s habits…for decades. We’ll explore their sage advice, and more.

History Links:

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/10/11/style/modern-love-what-shamu-taught-me-happy-marriage.html

Science Links:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/lessons-loving/201412/what-can-you-change-about-your-partner

https://www.verywellmind.com/how-much-should-you-try-to-change-your-partner-5191475

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/divorce-busting/200803/the-walkaway-wife-syndrome